“Stick and stones will break my bones but words will never hurt me.” I remember being told this so many times growing up and I’ve told it to my children as well. Its so very true, you can’t let what others say to you bother you and know that its only their opinion and those words DO NOT define me or you. At times those words hurt and its okay to feel that feeling but try your hardest to not let them suck you into believing they are true.
My mother recently said something to me the other day that really made me angry in that moment but later on, the more I thought about it the more it made me wonder if it was true.
Here is what went down, for my birthday she had bought me a jacket for my gift and I liked it and still do. A few weeks later I wore it to her home to drop something off I picked up for her and she says to me “oh my, your coat is getting small already, I just bought that for you.” I just stared at her like what did you just say to me? I told her the jacket still fit great that maybe it was just her eyes and I said bye quickly and left. I do not have time for you rude comments and I sometimes feel like she is jealous about how far I have come in my recovery and how I am proud of the way I look. I often tell her when we are together that its so crazy how my body has changed since I had my first child to having my third. She takes it as I am complaining I think and then tells me of all the things I can do it loose weight. I told her “oh you missed understood me, I am proud of my tiger stripes and I wouldn’t change them for the world!” You see when I was at my lowest point in my eating disorder I weighted barley 95 pounds and my body was starting to shut down. When I was at in-treatment Timothy and I had a meeting with one of my doctors and she had asked me what is one of my goals in life. I took a moment and thought about it and I told her I wanted to be a mother so badly. So looked me died in the eye and told me then I need to knock this shit off because my blood work shows that some organs are shutting down including my ovaries and its very unlikely that I will have children but there’s always hope. It was in that moment that I told myself that I need to get my shit together and work with all the doctors and therapists. So I love that my body has blessed me with my three wonderful children and I’m treating my body like a temple it is!
Love your bodies not mater what, its the only one you will ever get!